A New Year

A new year is about to begin and I as so many others have a list of resolutions, lose thirty pounds, grow my hair longer, and work on taking care of myself. I know coming up this year there will be a move from state to state and that is on my mind, making the transition smoothly is the primary concern. I know my life is going to change whether my resolutions are achieved or not. Because of this I cling to the familiar as long as I can as change is difficult for me and I will manage it the best that I can. I look forward to the move however and hope it ushers in a whole new life for me and my children. I have a sense of it being an adventure as much as I am clinging to the familiarity of a place I have lived for most of fifteen years. I ended up here on a whim and stayed because it was easier than leaving for a long time. I did leave once but without the support of my family it was a difficult move and I returned a bit battered from the experience. I hope to start a relationship with my youngest daughter and continue the one with my oldest daughter. I haven't seen my youngest in four years. That's a long time and now that the chance presents its self for me to move closer to her I intend to do so. I have a chance to change everything in my world and still keep some of the most familiar and supportive things. It is a gift. I have to budget money and manage how few things I will be able to take with me, we are moving bare bones, clothes and the few things we can't live without, no furniture and no moving van. I lost everything that I owned once before so I am not worried about the stuff I will be selling or giving away. I am anxious to start my life over and do the best I can for my girls. These kinds of changes are big and make us use courage to traverse the unknown that they present. This year I already know will be full of changes, that I can count on.